People find pole for various reasons. Maybe it was a fun bachelorette party experience, or you were inspired after seeing J-Lo on the pole. Whatever the reason may be, you tried it out and decided from that point forward if it would be a one-off thing or a new weekly commitment. My experience as to how I found pole and why I stuck with pole are two very different stories.
Why I Started Pole Dancing
I donāt remember every detail but somehow, I came across a silk aerialistās page on Instagram. I was intrigued and thought she moved so beautifully. I wanted to give it a try for no reason other than it looked cool and different. Plus, I hated going to regular gyms and thought it could be a fun alternative fitness route.
This is the good side of marketing: I started getting targeted ads for aerial silk classes. Normally targeted ads feel creepy and invasive, but I actually appreciated it this time. I got a Groupon for my ~now~ home studio with the mission of trying out aerial silks! I was so excited! I got the coupon for two weeks for any pole and aerial class.
Once I purchased my Groupon, I realized the studio closest to me didnāt offer many Intro to Silks classes at that time. They had plenty of Intro options for another location they had but it was too out of the way for me and I didnāt feel comfortable taking anything other than an Intro class. So, I figured, āwell, I already got it for two weeks, might as well do what I can!ā and signed up for a pole class instead. And boy! What a great decision that was.
I was instantly hooked after my very first class. My instructor was so bubbly, sweet, and really made everyone feel welcome. Up until this point in my life, I havenāt been half-dressed around a bunch of girls since high school P.E. and even that was uncomfortable. I filled up my entire 2-weeks with pole classes and loved every second of it. Once the two weeks were up, I contemplated back and forth for a month trying to figure out how to budget in a monthly membership. Pole lit a fire in me that I didnāt even know I had. And that leads me into why I stuck with pole.
Why I Continued Pole Dancing
When I was at the studio, I felt like a different person. I felt like a better version of myself: one thatās confident, determined, and strong. This was July of 2019 and I was still recovering from an awful and intense emotionally and mentally abusive relationship. Before that relationship, I was a more confident and stronger woman and after that relationship, I had felt really lost. I was more insecure and self-conscious. But the worst side effect of that relationship was how scared it made me to live again. I was so fearful of everything and Iāve seen first-hand what happens to people when theyāre too afraid to live and I didnāt want that to happen to me. I just didnāt know how to get over that mental block and I hated the feeling of lacking control over my own mind.
Pole helped pull me out of the darkest time of my life. I had found myself again and became an even better version of who I used to be. I reclaimed my power as a woman and genuinely started loving myself. I went from being terrified to post a normal picture on Instagram, thinking my abusive ex was still stalking me to kicking fear in the ass and made a public pole account for the world to see. I felt in control of my own life again and looked sexy while doing it.
Mind Over Matter
Pole fitness is the sport that connected my mind, body, and soul. Our minds are so powerful! Once you become more aware of how often we think of the past or the future, you start to realize that all our anxieties and fears come from not being present in the moment (The Power of Now). Pole makes me present and shows me just how strong I am. What once was impossible becomes possible, showing us that we really can do what we set our minds to.
Pole dancing sharpened my mind and built so much confidence inside of me that it spilled over into every aspect of my life. When you love yourself and know your worth, youāre going to have better friends, better relationship partners, better work environments, better everything. You may not fully agree and maybe I just have a more intrinsic mindset, but I donāt think we give our brains enough credit.
Our minds truly shape our reality and itās something I knew was true but didnāt fully feel it and understand it until I found pole dancing. And for that, Iām forever grateful and will always try to get people to try a pole class at least once in hopes that itāll change their life in the way it changed mine.
The Community
Some other great things about pole dancing is the community itself. This is the only community Iāve ever been a part of where itās largely female-dominated and the women are actually nice and uplifting to one another. Iāve never felt that weird unspoken jealousy or intimidation that most of us girls are familiar with. And thatās major considering weāre all exposing our flaws and stripping down in front of each other. If someone wanted to be a bitch, that would be the perfect opportunity to do it! But nobody does.
Part of me thinks this is because when weāre in the studio, itās just the studio. There are no outside factors like male attention or job promotions or whatever it is that causes women to dislike one another. Weāre all in the same room just being our authentic selves and wanting to improve and reach certain goals.
Plus, thereās still some stigma around pole dancing, and itās really nice to be surrounded by other people who fully understand the journey. A large majority of the world finds what we do sleazy and wouldnāt even be able to fathom the concept of pole improving our minds, bodies, and souls. So, having each other for support is something I truly cherish.
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I could go on and on forever about this topic, so Iāll leave it here. Thank you, pole, for saving my life and showing me just how amazing this life is. I will never take it for granted.
Related: How I Stay Motivated to Continue Pole Dancing
